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Sci/Tech: George Clooney DoSing Gawker Stalker
Friday, 31 March 2006 Written by

"Gawkers, I'm looking at you!"
For once someone in the entertainment industry has figured out how to do things in the internet world. A short while ago, in a classic case where someone should have asked themselves if they should have done something just because they could, the celebrity gossip site Gawker set up their Stalker system, where readers could use their mobile phones to text message sightings of celebrities. The aim was to keep an almost continuous tab on the movements of the glitterati.

It might be hard to drum up a lot of sympathy for the rich and the famous, who after all to a certain degree have sought out a life in the public eye. But it doesn't take much imagination and sober reflection to realise the potential for tragic results of this service.

If he were dead, the ghost of Mark Chapman would be hovering above Gawker's servers clutching a copy of "Catcher in the Rye". There are sadly people in this world who it would be best for everyone involved did not know that Nicole Kidman just went down a dark alley close by.

But actor/director/producer George Clooney has figured out the way to bring Gawker's Stalker down. While most celebrities and their people started screaming for more laws and clamp downs on free speech, Clooney had his publicist send out an email to other major publicists and representatives of celebrity clients, according to The New York Post. He had a cunning plan, which in fact would be a simple plan, if you were an average tech savvy kid, and not an over paid Hollywood PR flack.
"There is a simple way to render these guys useless. Flood their Web site with bogus sightings. Get your clients to get 10 friends to text in fake sightings of any number of stars. A couple hundred conflicting sightings and this Web site is worthless. No need to try to create new laws to restrict free speech. Just make them useless. That's the fun of it. And then sit back and enjoy the ride."

Gawker, who probably realise by now that they romanced the canine on this one, has picked up the news, and come off like a kid who's just understood that setting fire to the school gym might not have been such a swell idea, a bit sheepish.
If there's anyone to take us down, throw us around, and render us useless, it's him. Seriously, we've been fantasizing about that shit since ER.

Oh, and this just in, from a tipster: "Last night, 1 AM, saw George Clooney in a gang bang at The Eagle. He looked sweaty and was bleating like a sheep."

Oh well...